Origins of Joy

Oh the ups and downs in life and finding joy! Some of the joys in my life I first genuinely felt as an adult were in my twenties, when I was new to Florida. I have a clear picture in my mind of enjoying the warm December weather circa 1995. I was in awe of The Sunshine State, having grown up in North Carolina. The experience of a warm sunny day was a simple pleasure that brought me great peace. One particular moment was so clear I can instantly describe every sensation I encountered, like the crisp breeze that begged for a Christmas sweater that never stayed on the whole day. I look back to that picture sometimes and think;

Where did that pure joy go?

Joy Fades

Responsibilities change as we get older.

I got older. Developed my career, got married, had a child and gained more responsibility. Now my focus was on my good job, my first house, a new car. Those original moments of joy began to fade like old polaroids in a yellowed photo album. I was no longer living in the moment, no longer taking joy in the simplicity of the feel of the sun on my face, and I hadn’t been taking time out for myself.

The real moments of joy were found when I was purely in the moment, unhindered by rapid thoughts of bills and work and schedules.

Joy Found

As I celebrated my 40th birthday, it was apparent that I was relying on all the wrong things to bring back that experience of joy in my life – unnecessary purchases and alcohol. At the moment I’m shopping or drinking, those things feel great! But buyers remorse and post-alcohol let-down was not the price I was willing to pay.

I decided that I wanted that joy back, and finding it started from within. The best approach is to start shifting in little doses.The big problem I face is trying to change every facet of my life at once. Relationship, work, health & fitness. This can be really dangerous. Small wins are best.


Meditation is key on the road to recovering our lost joy. I hear too often from friends who are struggling with a lack of peace and joy in their lives they don’t have the time for meditation or they don’t know how. Meditation is free, and even five minutes a day makes a big difference. There is no special equipment required. The act of simply sitting in silence for five minutes with no distractions or technology is effective enough to do the job.

Writing and purging

Writing can be extremely cathartic. When I feel my thoughts are racing and I am overwhelmed, getting everything down on paper or electronically is a great brain dump. Sometimes this is a good alternative to dumping our negative or muddled thoughts on our friends. Once I’m done writing down all of my negative thoughts, I like to start a fresh page on what I DO want in my life. It is so important to renew after a purge with fresh thoughts.

Joyful Activities

Listening to music can be an amazing remedy. Sometimes the right song can bring a smile to my face, no matter what my current mood is. Or a song that you love to sing out loud when no one is in the car. Get to that place, get in the car if you have to.

Exercise causes a release of the chemical known as endorphins. Endorphins often create a feeling of euphoria – a direct path to joy!

Seek out friends who uplift you. Forget the saying, “Misery loves company”. Think instead about lighting a dark room. The brighter the light gets, the easier it is to see. The same goes with friends. Seek out someone who makes you laugh, or shows you the silver lining when there are clouds.

Bake, cook, or make crafts. This past Sunday, I was not in a place of joy when I woke up, by my own doing of drinking the night before. I wanted to sulk on the couch and bury myself in my own self-imposed misery. I called a friend who sparked the light inside me and I decided to work on my Christmas gifts for my friends. By the afternoon, I felt lighter and more at peace.

Have you lost your joy? Listen to your internal joy gauge. When you think about your job, or relationship, or location – do you feel irritated or frustrated? Do you begin the tangent of thoughts that lead to all of the anxieties you have been feeling? If so, change it. What makes you happy?

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For Christmas, I was delighted to use my Young Living Essential Oils to create a special treat for each of my friends. I racked my brain to see what I could make that would include these powerful oils. Someone I was sharing my thoughts with suggested candles. And that was it for me. I love candles, who doesn’t? Most candles we buy nowadays are filled with unhealthy additives and perfumes and aren’t suited for breathing. And most of them aren’t infused with the power of essential oils!

Essential Oil Candle

I personally feel that hand-crafted gifts are more precious to give than anything I could buy for someone. During the candle-making process, I focused on holding lots of love for each person for whom I made a candle.

Since there are specific essential oils for health, wellness, Abundance, Joy, and numerous other topics, I made a list of my friend’s deepest desires and challenges to come up with a special formula that was well-suited to each person.

For my friend “J”, I knew her challenges were with getting a good night’s sleep and keeping family harmony. Her formula included Lavender Essential Oil for sleep and Joy for togetherness. Some of the candles had two layers, separated by color and scent, while a couple actually had three and four layers!


I did some research and found a blog post that showed me how easy it was to use soy wax flakes to make essential oil candles with basic, everyday items. I’m a Prime member, so I started shopping on Amazon and found a 10lb bag for about $20. Although I love Amazon for most of my shopping, I was thrilled to find The Lone Star Candle Supply, which has a large assortment of candle-making supplies, as well as a candle-making university that provides additional education.

Here are the basic ingredients needed to make one candle with 8oz of wax:

  • 2 cups soy wax flakes – Buy Here
  • 1 8oz Mason jar (or 2 4oz Mason jars) – Buy Here
  • 1 large glass bowl on top of a pot of boiling water
  • 1 wick with metal base – Buy Here
  • 1 wooden closepin
  • 20-30 drops of pure Essential Oil (I am a Young Living Distributor, so I use only their oils)
  • 1 wooden spatula (dedicated to candle making)
  • 1 wooden skewer
  • OPTIONAL: candle dye for different colors – Buy Here
  • OPTIONAL: Mini pouring pot


Prepare all areas where candles are being made with paper towels!

Fill the pot with 2 cups water; bring to a boil. Lower to a simmer. Carefully place bowl on top of pot. Add soy flakes. Using wooden spoon, stir often as flakes begin to melt.

Bowl and boiling pot

Once flakes are completely melted into liquid, (optionally) add dye and stir with wooden skewer. Turn off heat and carefully pour liquid into mini pouring pot.

Mini pouring pot

Mini pouring pot with liquid and dye.

If you do not have a pouring pot, you will have to pour from the glass bowl. Dip metal end of wick into liquid, retaining enough wax to set, and place into the center of the bottom of the containers. Use a wooden skewer to assist with pressing the metal end of the wick into the candle. Allow wax to set before attaching wooden clothespin so that it supports an upright position for the wick.


It is very important that the clothespin is steady so when you are ready to pour the liquid, it will stay put.

Add the essential oils to your liquid while still in the pouring pot or bowl and stir using the wooden skewer. It is important not to do this while heating to avoid burning off the fragrance. It is also easier to do this prior to adding to the candle container to prevent movement of the wick.

Once the wick is set, carefully pour the liquid into the candle container. If the wick does shift during this process, the wooden skewer can help guide it back into place. If you are making layered candles, pour the liquid to the desired level and let cool for many hours before adding the additional layers. Leave the clothespin in place until the candle has completely cooled.

First layer of liquid in jar

Wax is very messy and difficult to clean. Here are some tips for handling it:

  • Use paper towels EVERYWHERE. Wax will drip on places you never imagined!
  • DO NOT put liquid wax down the drain. You will incur serious plumbing issues!
  • Wipe wax out of the glass bowl while still liquified (but not too hot) and pouring pot using paper towels. Follow up with Windex to completely remove remaining wax.
  • Wax melts wax, so if some residue remains in your utility containers, you can remove it on the next round of wax melting!


Once the wax has cooled (at least 2 hours), remove the clothespin and cut the wick. Let the candle cool overnight before adding a lid or other cover.

I have enjoyed making candles so much it has become a calming activity for me, and continues to be great gifts for friends! I no longer have to buy expensive candles that are infused with scents I do not enjoy. AND I can reuse the containers from old candles as well!

I calculated the ingredients purchased above plus lids and labels, and the average cost per 8oz candle is about $3.


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joy-essential-oilI am excited to about Joy™, a delightful blend of Bergamot, Ylang Ylang, Geranium, Lemon, Coriander, Tangerine, Jasmine, Roman Chamomile, Palmarosa, and Rose essential oils by Young Living.

I first encountered Joy™ after a dear friend shared it with me on a beautiful day following a 5k along the beach. My running partners and I dropped a few drops on our hands, rubbed them together, and held them to our faces and inhaled the wonderful scent. I enjoy Joy’s warm and comforting aroma.

This blend is a fragrance that inspires romance and togetherness.

essence-of-joyIn the mornings, I inhale first thing to get my day started off on a positive note. Not only is it warm and comforting, I also find it invigorating as well!

My Christmas gifts for my friends (shhhh!) are custom made using Joy as a fragrance. I was so thrilled to be able to create gifts for my friends that would give them the same Joy they have given me!

Essential oils can be used in many ways, as inhalants, topically, or diffused. Once I have given my gifts for the holidays, I look forward to sharing my process here.

If you are interested, you can sign up as a Young Living distributor and order your oils at wholesale prices! Click here to sign up now!

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